The Burden of Proof
It's always a terrible time to be alive. Something is burning, something else is flooding, and there's graveyards full of gods.
Someone believes something that isn't true- “I can fix him”, “My mother is always watching me”, “Death would feel great right now”. Death would feel like nothing right now. You want to feel nothing. But it's hard to assert a non-existence. How does one prove it?
Statistically, God should have gotten bored. It would have been better for all parties involved if we came up with some sort of arrangement. God could set up communism and we could put on weekend shows to entertain him. I would give God a lap-dance, and my boyfriend would do stand-up. Idk, something.
Personally, I think The Law and Its Courts are for nobler people than me. I could never request a third party to mediate my conflicts. But for a person that saves such reverence for Greater Forces than Themselves, The Law speaks of The Burden of Proof. The Burden of Proof, in Civilian Cases, typically rests on the Plaintiff- the person filing the Complaint. In Criminal Cases, it rests on the State, the Public Prosecutor. A Defendant is presumed Innocent until Proven Guilty Beyond Reasonable Doubt. Or sometimes, on The Preponderance of Probabilities.
That sounded a bit like the instruction manual of a game lol, I'm sorry. It happens in Courts, what did you expect?
This second standard for Evidence though, The Preponderance of Probabilities, I propose that we introduce into everyday conversation as well. Simply, it is enough that the existence of something is more likely than it's non existence.
My problem with smart people is how they could stall a simple conversation with infinite what ifs. I don't mind dealing with your insecurities, but a doubt is just a doubt. Can we stick to the subject?
The Burden of Proof is always on the person it is harder to believe. And it is a burden because otherwise the substance is wound into the conversation itself- we wouldn't need to substantiate it.
I'm not saying people don't lie. I'm saying the act of asking for proof is never a neutral one. It is a statement with an agenda. A statement which is read in the context of the relationship between the speaker and the listener.
So what do we do when those who listen to us don't believe us?
In Complaint!, Sara Ahmed explores, through testimonies, how the formal systems of complaints in institutions are designed to favour those being complained about. But she holds onto the resistance implied in the act of complaining.
A complaint can be a poster, a performance, a recital
And on the other end, we learn to listen better. To believe is to know a person is trying to tell you they need something. Something you could give them. However they phrase it. However whiny their voice might sound.
A complaint is not a blame. It is a request. A determinedly defensive one. It is not necessary that I submit to you when I think you could help me. It is sufficient you see the good that would come of helping a fellow.
And so, we don't leave justice to the courts. We make it a daily attempt.